ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
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