Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
Randomize
