That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Randomize