i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
Randomize
