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take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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