How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Randomize
