I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
I want to be your penis for a week.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
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