I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Randomize
