Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize