Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
why do cheetos always look like penises
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
We were destined to go to rehab together
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
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