me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
I JUST MACED MY OWN FACE
This is by far the best text I have ever woken up to.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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