I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
My Higher Power is John Stamos
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
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