You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
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