I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
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