y did u give ur computer a hand job?
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Randomize
