Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
fml, blew my nose and red sprinkles came out and did the splits when i sneezed
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
Randomize
