Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
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