So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
Randomize
