In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
Watching her eat just hurts me
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
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