real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
My vagina just clenched in fear
Randomize
