He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Found the puke drawer
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
