I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
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