He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
It's rum buckets o'clock
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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