Do you still have your period?
i barfeds in our rink
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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