Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Randomize
