Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Randomize