You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Randomize
