You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Randomize
