just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Randomize