Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
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