this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
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