Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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