So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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