i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
