Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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