Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
