yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
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We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
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She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks