Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize
