i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
Randomize