I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Sorry about my life...
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
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