I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Randomize
