Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
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