I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Randomize
