I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
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