just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
Why is your signature on my underwear?
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Randomize