I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
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