she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
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