I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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