So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
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