The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Randomize
